31 december 2003
Zo, weer aanwezig
Dat was een lekkere week op een berg in Frankrijk.
Wat is het toch comfortabel om weer thuis te zijn: warm toilet, toiletpapier niet in een bak ernaast, warme doucheruimte (met onbeperkt warm water), warme andere vertrekken, superGASfornuis, fris, schoon, niet vochtig, computer (maar zonder is toch ook wel rustig), mobiele bereikbaarheid (idem) en nog veel meer natuurlijk, maar nu oudjaar en ook nog veel meer (natuurlijk).
Hmm, dat was een soort lange zin.
20 december 2003
Alledaags leven
(Uit: "Fabels van zen-meester Raaf", uitspraken en gebruiken van een wijze vogel. Samenstelling Robert Aitken.)
Wasbeer kwam opnieuw uit Cedarford en zei: "Mijn probleem is dat ik niet weet hoe ik mijn oefeningen in het alledaagse leven moet gebruiken."
"Wat voor oefeningen?" vroeg Raaf.
"Heel veel zazen," zei Wasbeer.
"Dat kun je waarschijnlijk niet gebruiken," zei Raaf.
"Wat voor nut heeft zazen dan?" vroeg Wasbeer.
Raaf antwoordde: "Zazen komt voort uit belofte; beloften komen voort uit het streven naar bewustwording; het streven naar bewustwording komt voort uit een intens gevoel van ontevredenheid; het intense gevoel van ontevredenheid komt voort uit een egocentrische houding. Als je je realiseert dat de juiste houdingen goed zijn voor padden en duizendpoten, dan houdt dat in dat onder je oefeningen ook het wassen van je vlees valt."
"Dus zazen staat niet centraal?" vroeg Wasbeer.
"Het is de kern," zei Raaf.
18 december 2003
Ja! Ze is 1 jaar geworden
Ze = Yaika, Yaika-babe, Yaika-baberd, Yaika-bobberd, Bobberd, Het Kleine Vrouwtje, Het Monster en waarschijnlijk nog meer waar ik nu niet opkom.
Ik ben zo blij met haar. Ik ben ook zo blij met Mr. Quan. Maar ik ben ook zo blij met Emke-babe.
Zo blij dat ik op deze manier hier mag/kan zijn! Een groot geschenk.
Van wie/wat eigenlijk?
POSTURE
"These forms are not the means of obtaining the right state of mind. To take this posture is itself to have the right state of mind. There is no need to obtain some special state of mind."
(Uit: "Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind", Informal talks on Zen meditation and practice by Shunryu Suzuki)
Now I would like to talk about our zazen posture. When
you sit in the full lotus position, your left foot is on your right
thigh, and your right foot is on your left thigh. When we
cross our legs like this, even though we have a right leg and
a left leg, they have become one. The position expresses the
oneness of duality: not two, and not one. This is the most
important teaching: not two, and not one. Our body and
mind are not two and not one. If you think your body and
mind are two, that is wrong; if you think that they are one,
that is also wrong. Our body and mind are both two and one.
We usually think that if something is not one, it is more than
one; if it is not singular, it is plural. But in actual experience,
our life is not only plural, but also singular. Each one of us
is both dependent and independent.
After some years we will die. If we just think that it is
the end of our life, this will be the wrong understanding.
But, on the other hand, if we think that we do not die, this
is also wrong. We die, and we do not die. This is the right
understanding. Some people may say that our mind or soul
exists forever, and it is only our physical body which dies.
But this is not exactly right, because both mind and body
have their end. But at the same time it is also true that they
exist eternally. And even though we say mind and body,
they are actually two sides of one coin. This is the right
understanding. So when we take this posture it symbolizes
this truth. When I have the left foot on the right side of my
body, and the right foot on the left side of my body, I do not
know which is which. So either may be the left or the right
side.
The most important thing in taking the zazen posture is
to keep your spine straight. Your ears and your shoulders
should be on one line. Relax your shoulders, and push up
towards the ceiling with the back of your head. And you
should pull your chin in. When your chin is tilted up, you
have no strength in your posture; you are probably dream-
ing. Also to gain strength in your posture, press your dia-
phragm down towards your hara, or lower abdomen. This
will help you maintain your physical and mental balance.
When you try to keep this posture, at first you may find some
difficulty breathing naturally, but when you get accustomed
to it you will be able to breathe naturally and deeply.
Your hands should form the "cosmic mudra." If you put
your left hand on top of your right, middle joints of your
middle fingers together, and touch your thumbs lightly to-
gether (as if you held a piece of paper between them), your
hands will make a beautiful oval. You should keep this uni-
versal mudra with great care, as if you were holding some-
thing very precious in your hand. Your hands should be held
against your body, with your thumbs at about the height of
your navel. Hold your arms freely and easily, and slightly
away from your body, as if you held an egg under each arm
without breaking it.
You should not be tilted sideways, backwards, or for-
wards. You should be sitting straight up as if you were
supporting the sky with your head. This is not just form or
breathing. It expresses the key point of Buddhism. It is a
perfect expression of your Buddha nature. If you want true
understanding of Buddhism, you should practice this way.
These forms are not a means of obtaining the right state of
mind. To take this posture itself is the purpose of our prac-
tice. When you have this posture, you have the right state of
mind, so there is no need to try to attain some special state.
When you try to attain something, your mind starts to wan-
der about somewhere else. When you do not try to attain
anything, you have your own body and mind right here. A
Zen master would say, "Kill the Buddha!" Kill the Buddha
if the Buddha exists somewhere else. Kill the Buddha, be-
cause you should resume your own Buddha nature.
Doing something is expressing our own nature. We do not
exist for the sake of something else. We exist for the sake
of ourselves. This is the fundamental teaching expressed in
the forms we observe. Just as for sitting, when we stand in
the zendo we have some rules. But the purpose of these rules
is not to make everyone the same, but to allow each to ex-
press his own self most freely. For instance, each one of us
has his own way of standing, so our standing posture is based
on the proportions of our own bodies. When you stand, your
heels should be as far apart as the width of your own fist,
your big toes in line with the centers of your breasts. As in
zazen, put some strength in your abdomen. Here also your
hands should express your self. Hold your left hand against
your chest with fingers encircling your thumb, and put your
right hand over it. Holding your thumb pointing downward,
and your forearms parallel to the floor, you feel as if you have
some round pillar in your grasp-a big round temple pillar-
so you cannot be slumped or tilted to the side.
The most important point is to own your own physical
body. If you slump, you will lose your self. Your mind will
be wandering about somewhere else; you will not be in your
body. This is not the way. We must exist right here, right
now! This is the key point. You must have your own body
and mind. Everything should exist in the right place, in the
right way. Then there is no problem. If the microphone I use
when I speak exists somewhere else, it will not serve its
purpose. When we have our body and mind in order, every-
thing else will exist in the right place, in the right way.
But usually, without being aware of it, we try to change
something other than ourselves, we try to order things out-
side us. But it is impossible to organize things if you yourself
are not in order. When you do things in the right way, at
the right time, everything else will be organized. You are
the "boss." When the boss is sleeping, everyone is sleeping.
When the boss does something right, everyone will do
everything right, and at the right time. That is the secret of
Buddhism.
So try always to keep the right posture, not only when
you practice zazen, but in all your activities. Take the right
posture when you are driving your car, and when you are
reading. If you read in a slumped position, you cannot stay
awake long. Try. You will discover how important it is to
keep the right posture. This is the true teaching. The teach-
ing which is written on paper is not the true teaching.
Written teaching is a kind of food for your brain. Of course
it is necessary to take some food for your brain, but it is
more important to be yourself by practicing the right way
of life.
That is why Buddha could not accept the religions existing
at his time. He studied many religions, but he was not satis-
fied with their practices. He could not find the answer in
asceticism or in philosophies. He was not interested in some
metaphysical existence, but in his own body and mind, here
and now. And when he found himself, he found that every-
thing that exists has Buddha nature. That was his enlighten-
ment. Enlightenment is not some good feeling or some
particular state of mind. The state of mind that exists when
you sit in the right posture is, itself, enlightenment. If you
cannot be satisfied with the state of mind you have in zazen,
it means your mind is still wandering about. Our body and
mind should not be wobbling or wandering about. In this
posture there is no need to talk about the right state of
mind. You already have it. This is the conclusion of
Buddhism.
14 december 2003
13 december 2003
God
(overgetypt uit: "Teaching of the Great Mountain", zen talks by Taizan Maezumi)
Do you believe in God?
That's a very interesting question, more than interesting,
it's a quite serious question.
When we as Buddhists are asked,
how do we answer?
It can happen to any of you, anytime.
How do you answer it?
Most of you were raised in the Judeo-Christian tradition
and people expect you to have some understanding
and maybe even faith of belief.
But for me too, if I'm asked that question,
how am I supposed to answer, see?
In fact, it happened twice very recently.
One time I answered that I definitely believe in God,
at another time I said, definitely I do not believe in God.
Why?
Because I always tell the truth!
I mean it.
Do you know what I mean?
Since the question is posed
from a relative perspective or sphere,
the answer is always yes and no.
And either way is true.
So I quite happily say yes one time
and I say no another time.
Nothing wrong with it.
Is it right or wrong?
Is anyone right or wrong?
That's my joke!
When we are asked whether God exists or not,
our belief makes a difference, of course.
Whether you answer yes of no
depends on your belief or understanding
of who God is.
But we understand everything
in a way as much as we understand,
and that isn't necessarily true understanding
of who God is.
It rather openly invites arguments and questions.
What did Buddha say about this?
If Buddha was asked the same question
what would he answer, and why?
He himself was born in a rather high class
and his family followed the Hindu tradition.
They had of course the god Brahman.
Nobody denied his existence.
But do you know what kind of attitude Buddha took?
We can definitely learn from him.
He said, we don't really know what God is
and I will not spend any time trying
to know what is unknowable.
So he had a very pragmatic attitude.
Many people talk about God
and of course for those who believe
in the fact that God exists,
sure, God exists.
Why not?
But what about those who don't?
And we shouldn't mix things up.
Whether we have faith or belief in God or not
and whether God exists or not,
are two different things.
Some believe in God and some don't
it's none of our business.
In a way yes, in a way no.
And if I do not know what God is,
if I don't have faith in God
as it is usually understood, that's fine too.
I can survive without having faith in God.
But it has nothing to do with whether God exists or not.
Personally, I'm quite happy and content
without having the blessings of God.
The Buddhas and Bodhisattvas are enough for me.
I'm sure, here in Salt Lake City
you encounter questions about God constantly,
since you're almost a neighbor of the Mormon Temple.
Everybody knows this is a very strong center of the LDS church.
And I want you to have very clear answers.
Not everyone of you needs to say the same thing -
then it sounds fishy!
You all have your own very distinct understanding
or appreciation of who or what God is,
and whether you believe in Him or not.
However you answer,
it's fine.
But you should have faith
in what you say!
Just don't say, "I am God,"
because it is not true!
Buddha never said that kind of thing.
How you phrase your answer is a very delicate matter.
With words you can so easily hurt other people
and that much you hurt yourself.
So be careful about that.
And even Buddha -
if you're asked by anybody
"Who is Buddha?"
how do you answer?
It's not easy, see.
And if you're asked further,
"What's the difference between Buddha and God?"
how do you answer?
If you grew up in the Judeo-Christian tradition,
you are supposed to believe in God.
Just one God!
So what is Buddha?
Buddha is not only Shakyamuni Buddha,
he is one of the transformations of Kannon Bodhisattva.
So I disagree if you say, "I am God."
but if you say, "I am Kannon Bodhisattva,"
I will smile.
Whether or how you believe in God
is a very serious question for all of us.
Especially here for Kanzeon Sangha.
since you live so close to the Mormon temple.
How do we coexist with other religious groups?
- even on the same street!
So I think it's wise to be well prepared
And if you have any excellent answers
before I leave,
please let me know!
09 december 2003
05 december 2003
Bah, kortzichtigheid!
Eerst verlekkerd in hoekje staan te kijken en vervolgens huilen om een dikke poepbroek.